This morning I was writing a letter to my future husband,
and I ended the letter with the question “What do I do?”… Upon writing the closing of the letter, this
song suddenly popped into my head…
“What does this song have to do with writing a letter to
your husband?” you may ask… Well, as I
was sitting there I started to think about the words of the song.
“What now? What will
you do, now that you’ve found Me? What now? What will you do with this treasure
you’ve found? I know I may not look
like what you expected, but if you remember, this is right where I said I would
be… You found Me… What now?”
I started to think about my life, and how it does not at all
look like what I expected it to look like.
I’m 27 years old, and I’ve never had a boyfriend… I’ve never been on a
date… I’ve never had a prospect… My plan was to be married at twenty! I was supposed to start having kids at the
age of twenty-five… What now?
“I know I may not look like what you expected, but if you
remember, this is right where I said I would be… You found Me…”
Because of my singleness, I have had my ups and downs in my
communication with the Lord over this past year. But in all of the stuff that
I’ve been through, I still trust Him with my future. Singleness is where I have found Him. Singleness is where I have seen His Face! Singleness is where I have drawn closer to
Him in trust. Singleness is not the end
of the world. Singleness is where I am
supposed to be in this moment in my life.
Yes, I still desire to get married. Yes, I hope that the man who will become my
husband walks into my life tomorrow.
But I don’t want that to define me.
I want God to define me.
What now? I’m going
to strive to be the best example of God’s love that I can be. I want to shine the light of God’s love
everywhere I go. I want to desire Him
over a husband. I want God to be my
joy. He is my joy… Sometimes I just
have to reevaluate and remember why He is my joy. He is my Salvation. He
saved me by paying the ultimate price.
I don’t have to spend an eternity in hell because Jesus took all my
lies, my disrespect, my selfish pride, my judgmental attitude, my anger, my
fear, my eye rolls, etc… He took all of it away and put his name on every
single one of my sins. How can I not be
joyful in that?
Where have you seen the face of Jesus? Where does he make Himself most evident to
you? What now?
~ S*
Your blog entries are so well-written and insightful. They always make me reflect on my own life and how God is working within me. Lately, I've been seeing the face of Jesus in my spouse, as we work through difficulties he has been incredibly patient and loving. I see Him also in my family, realizing I've done little to earn their love. Thank you for reminding of the unconditional love that He extends us all.
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